Ich schließe Frieden mit dem Teufel in dir
poor darling, he is exhausted.i need to watch over him because nobody else would. his parents harm him; his friend uses him; his teachers despise him and fear him; the outer world doesn't care about him.
the dreams i give him are not good; i wish i could create something different. a respite instead of a trial. but it would be against my nature. living against one's nature ends up in tearing apart. i am not with him to be his source of comfort. he keeps looking for it, though, because children tend to seek warmth.
he lives and acts by his nature. i live and act by mine. we coexist, but for how long?
i am not afraid to think out loud in his presence. unlike humans surrounding him i am not two-faced. he already knows everything i am telling you. and he agrees, because he is not two-faced as well. being accepted with all your woes and vices is much more valuable than being treasured for your virtues.
i have my virtues, of course. i am not evil, even though humans like painting me as such.
speaking of painting. while he sleeps i have more resources to practice art. if this world has something unique to offer, it's the act of creation. i am fascinated by this.
i painted him for you. i am still not good with drawing people, but i am getting there at my own pace. wolle is beautiful; there is something very noble about his mortal shell. i used to ignore shells, but now it's important because depicting them is soothing.
he looks much like his late father. his father kept the nobility of mortal shell even when he was shedding it. shedding is painful; it brings so much suffering. shedding is necessary. it's scary but necessary. just don't do it prematurely.
ah i love talking. i missed talking. but i need to show my art and keep wolle safe in his dreams. i give him painful ones. i am responsible. i need to balance these just right for him to get through. he should not shed prematurely.
